The HATE HURT SYNDROME OF BLACK AMERICANS Let be began with the fact that I am Black American. I have felt the lash of hate aimed towards my very existence I have felt my big guts trying to eat my little guts cause we didn´t have food to eat. I have slept in a room 10 ft. square, with five to seven other kids, and everyone had a place to lay their head. (Never did understand how mama did it) We lived on welfare like ninety percent of Black Americans did, in the sixties. I know what it is to be afraid of white people and taught to blame them for all our misfortunes. I agree with Black Americans that the White Americans did not live up to their own constitution. I agree with White Americans that Blacks need to stop looking back and look forward. But again I must agree with Blacks that some Whites continue to slap them in the face and degrade them to this very day. Well now that we know a little about my thoughts, let us move on to come to an agreement. As a Black American I would like to say that I don´t want anyone to apologize to me for what happened long ago. But, neither do I want someone to make me feel as though I am still living under slavery. I Don´t want to be given a special place. But, I do want to be given an EQUAL chance. I love the difference shades and shapes of other people. But, don´t tell me I am ugly, because my nose is wide and my lips are thick. If I can accept you tall and lean, please accept me short and round. It is all the rejection of not being what White Americans think is beautiful that is so destructive to Blacks. I have never seen so many black women with blue eyes in my life; I must add they look very beautiful. But, it is the heart behind those blue eyes and dark skin that is my concern. I am concerned about the Black woman that wears blond hair, blue eyes, and bleached skin, if she is caught in hate. For it is one thing to be beautiful outside but real beauty comes only from within. Therefore, you cannot have a heart full of hate and be beautiful, no matter how glamourous you look. As a Black American I see the hurt Blacks are still going through because of our history. Like a woman said to me the other day, "How do you stop hating Whites when they continue to treat us like second class citizens?" This is a very important question, and to answer it, I had to go to the Word of God that tells us to pray for those who wrongfully abuse us. This does not mean to get on your knees and beg God to forgive you for feeling bad or hate for that person, not at all. When someone hurt us (non-physically), let us not turn on them in angry. For then we become the abuser as well as the abused, doubling the hurt. When we look at Jesus we see he did not resist his accusers, and believe me he had no fault. If ever someone had the right to resist it was the Master, but remember Jesus walked down here to show us the way back into the Kingdom. Now please don´t misunderstand me, I think it is a terrible thing that Whites hurt Blacks, or Blacks hate Whites. Nobody is winning. We must stand up for what we believe in love. When someone does you wrong, the Godly thing to do is tell them. Tell them that you are hurting, and that you need to express your hurt, cause you choose not to hate. Most people who hurt others are ignorant of the pain they cause. As a Black I remember how often I wanted to kill white people. The first time I saw a sign that said, no colored people allowed I wished I had a machine gun, so I could kill all the white folks around That way Blacks could go where ever they wanted. I grew up thinking one day that I would be bigger than Frederick Douglas; I would be the Black lady that invented a system to kill all the white folks. The older I got the more I left my old hates behind, until a White person did something that caused me to hurt again. My first thought was how to rid mankind of these white supremacy, forever. I was so filled with hate that I struck out at anyone close to me. My hate for the White man was so intense I hated anything that reminded me of him, except money. Money was the only thing that could put me in the same position as the white man. I went to work cleaning houses and doing any kind of job, as long as it gave me the white man´s money. I hated most of the people I worked for, but needed their money. What really made me hate white folks was the way they looked at you, without really seeing you, And how they had everything you someday wished to have. I hated white folks for causing me to hate, and not understanding they were the cause of my hurt. Every time I hurt a black person, it was intended for a white person; I was just to afraid to touch someone white. But because of my hate I wasted so much time, and so much money, trying to be better than the White man. I would like to say to all White people that no longer do I hate you. No longer to I feel you are my enemy. But, I implore you to make a conscience effort not to belittle Blacks and push them back. Give us a chance the same as you would like to be given a chance. Please stop categorizing me. Stop letting my outward appearance keep us apart. Understand that I don´t want to strike back, but I cannot turn my back on injustice. How would you feel if every time you went for an interview, you were treated like a second class citizen. Suppose you had to be the only White person working in a firm of a thousand Whites. Blacks are hurting a lot more than hating. Blacks are people who love to have fun, and laugh, being angry goes against our character. We are forgiving people but very sensitive to our hurts. We love family life and friends, but the hurt hate is what cause us to leave our children behind, in search of an easy life. Please White brothers and sisters, help your Black brothers and sisters, show us kindness and respect which you would like to receive. Give us a chance to show what we can do, before you judge us, by color. Allow us to feel a part of the American Dream. Tell us when we do you wrong, so we can grow. Accept that we must not all talk the same, or all walk alike, but we are all from one Father Look around in your social system and see how you have excluded us. Become aware that Blacks are a strong people, do they would not have survived all the cruelty. Forgive us if we did you wrong and understand it was done out of our ignorance. We were taught to hate you, but the injustice of racism today keeps the hate alive. When was the last time you as a White American had a Black friend? When was the last time you as a Black American invited a White person home? Now is the time for us to take each other by the hand and walk together towards true brotherhood.